On Air with Ella {BLOG}
A NOTE TO THOSE WHO ARE STRUGGLING...
For so long, I was restricting my foods (I called it "clean eating"), and obsessing about my body’s imperfections. It took a lot of reading and learning to undo decades of moralizing food choices and detaching my identity from what I saw in the mirror.
Here's what I gave up:
In order to spend my energy on things that served me far better than obsession, I let go of:
Body scanning and looking for flaws every damn day (this actually meant looking in the mirror less)
Stepping on the scale. Absolutely no scale, no weighing - ever. There’s no upside there for me.
Talking about my body - no more complaining to my hubby, no more swapping stories with my buddies, and I don't oblige comments from anyone (Did you know ... you can reject this dialogue with strength, kindness and consistency)
Notions that I should look a certain way because "I used to" or because "she does"
Self-focus (I really wanted to stop thinking about myself so very much)
Here's what I took ON:
Spending my energy on SO MANY MORE things. I'm not exaggerating. When you're managing food obsession, binge eating or body dysmorphia, it's a full-time, brain-eating, resource-consumptive job. My brain - and my time - is now elsewhere.
Joy
Gratitude for experiences, instead of worrying about what I looked like having those experiences
Peace
Listening to body cues about hunger, satiation and eating as "soothing" - I can now do all 3, peacefully! (I never thought I would)
I want to live in the space between the extremes.
I want to care about this gift we get in having a body, and yet not think about it all day. I want to live in it, but not at all FOR it. I want to be strong and vibrant and flexible and happy in every body I show up in. I simply want to be an example of what's possible - just like you.
I am not a counselor, not a guru, not a nutritionist, not a registered dietitian. All I am is someone who’s been through it.
If you’re struggling, just know that this is a topic very familiar to me and to the On Air with Ella podcast. Here's an episode to start with: Body Image - What's Working for Me.
If you ever want a list of the books and resources that helped get me through, just hit me up with a DM. There is so much on the other side of food obsession. True freedom really is possible.
Big hugs,
Ella xoxo
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xxoo Ella