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338: Embracing Discomfort: Small Steps to Develop a Better Relationship with Uncertainty - Nicole Whiting

On Air with Ella episode 338

nicole whiting is on air with ella 338

Why we don't change...

Our tendency to repeat patterns, even when they don't serve us, is often rooted in our desire for the familiar and our resistance to uncertainty. We cling to these bad habits subconsciously, because they provide a sense of comfort and predictability.

Even when behaviors are bad for us, they are familiar to us.

We repeat behaviors because they are familiar

I love talking with you about how to change the habits we don’t want, and how to cultivate the ones that we do. Whether it’s saving more money or spending less, or creating more connection and less doom scrolling. Or maybe it’s drinking less and nourishing more. Whatever it is, it’s crucial to recognize our tendency toward what is familiar, and cultivating a relationship with the unfamiliar - with uncertainty - so that we can change.

We can create real change

After all, that’s what change requires, right? A small step into the unknown, a bit of uncertainty about how to navigate through that change (or any new behavior we’re trying to commit to.)

So, today I’m talking with my guest Nicole Whiting about being willing to be uncomfortable. About recognizing that uncertainty is required for habit breaking and habit making

And it's important because fearing and avoiding uncertainty - whether it’s subconscious or not - leads to unhealthy behaviors like withholding intimacy, closing off, and pushing the best version of you away.

Embracing uncertainty in order to grow

Embracing uncertainty requires openness, vulnerability, and provides opportunities for growth. When we let go of needing control and certainty, we open ourselves to new experiences, new perspectives, and our own evolution.

I’ll go one step further and posit that seeking constant certainty is anxiety-provoking. It keeps us ruminating, overanalyzing, and stuck where we are.

Resilience is built through navigating uncertainty and surviving. When we trust our ability to cope with whatever life brings, we become more confident within ourselves. 

Enjoy this conversation with Nicole and consider how cultivating a relationship with uncertainty is a direct path toward greater self-trust, and to making the changes you want to make for yourself.

Because that’s what we’re about, right? Creating a life that’s more of what we want, and less of want we don’t.

In this episode:

- The familiarity of behaviors we're trying to break

- Get off autopilot! Making intentional choices

- Allowing ourselves to change our minds

- Fitness vs. Movement - finding joyful fitness

- Being willing to be a beginner

- Practice being uncomfortable

- Initiating change while detaching from outcomes

- Building confidence in uncertainty

- Small steps to develop a relationship with uncertainty

- Developing intuition and inner voice

- Simple steps to practice assertiveness

- Building tolerance for discomfort

nicole whiting smiling


With a passion for unlocking the intricacies of the human psyche, Nicole Whiting bridges the gap between science and soul. As a clinically trained (e)Motion coach and a PhD student in Developmental Coaching, she delves deep into the realms of human relationships, potential, and healing. Her groundbreaking work has been showcased in esteemed publications like Psychology Today. 

Connect with Nicole @nicolewhitingcoaching


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xoxo Ella

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